The Power Pause: Redefining Maternity Leave
While at times it feels like groundhog day, we’ve all heard the phrase “maternity leave isn’t a vacation” - and any parent who’s survived the newborn phase, sleep regressions, or toddler tantrums, knows that’s the understatement of the century. But what if we took that even further? What if, instead of viewing maternity leave as stepping away from our lives and careers, we saw it as stepping into something? A power pause, as Neha Ruch calls it - a transformative season of growth, insight, and recalibration.
Matrescence: The Becoming Behind the Bottles
It’s true: maternity leave is anything but restful. It’s leaky, loud, sleep-deprived, and full of moments where you question everything, including your own identity. But nestled between the cluster feeds, self-doubt, and contact naps is an invitation to enter something deeper: matrescence - the messy, magical, identity-altering journey of becoming a mother.
And here’s the truth most of us weren’t warned about: this transformation doesn’t happen in a day. It needs space. Which is exactly what a power pause offers. And it doesn’t necessarily end when you return to work. Matrescence may take months, but generally it takes years. Which can result in us questioning everything, especially when it’s time to return to work.
Service, not Leave
Neha Ruch also speaks to the concept of maternity as service. For months - years, really - you are on-call in ways you never imagined. Your time, your body, your brain? All fully booked. This is leadership. This is devotion. This is showing up, over and over, with no performance bonus or annual review. The world may not hand you a gold star, but let’s be clear: you are in deep service. And your sacrifice matters.
Don’t Bounce Back - Bounce Forward
That’s why reframing this season matters. This isn’t about “getting back to normal” or proving your ambition is still intact. It’s about recognizing that you’re not behind - you’re just evolving. Time management, emotional intelligence, conflict resolution, resilience, crisis management, creative problem-solving, boundary-setting, self-awareness, and leadership, are all skills you develop in motherhood. And that, my friend, is a lot of growth. So no, it’s not maternity “leave”… a period of rest, playing at the park, and going for brunches. That’s why it’s important to re-define it as a power pause… it isn’t a timeout; it’s a transformation incubator.
Amongst all these skills, your purpose and your values change. Maybe you emerge with clarity. Maybe you’re questioning everything you once knew. Maybe you’re working on finding a balance between the lack of control and this new role. Maybe you finally understand what kind of boundaries you need around your time. Maybe you discover new creative sparks. That’s momentum. And it counts.
Take the Pause. Own the Power.
But be kind to yourself. While it can lead to re-evaluating career or life goals, or researching additional training or education, it doesn’t have to mean launching a business during nap time (unless that’s your thing). It can be as simple as tuning into your own thoughts during a stroller walk. Naming your needs. Starting to prioritize yourself or your health, or taking up a new hobby. Noticing the ways you’re growing. Starting to slow down. Learning to be present. Not buying into the bullshit that everyone else demands of us. Crafting a life on your terms. Or simply giving this season and raising your kids, everything you’ve got.
You don’t need to do more to prove this time matters. You just need to be in it, and start seeing the new YOU. What is it that really matters?
Actions to Anchor Your Power Pause:
Journal the shift. Keep a voice note or a scribbled list of how your identity is changing - without needing to fix or rush it.
Find your people. Whether it’s a moms group, an online space, or one friend who gets it, connection is gold during matrescence and this transition.
Say it out loud. Remind yourself (daily if needed): “This is not time off. This is time in. I am in a season of becoming.” And no, you don’t need to know where you’re going for now.
Read & Reflect: And if you’re looking for inspiration for where to go next? Start reading & listening to podcasts that interest you. The Power Pause by Neha Ruch is a good place to start. And her Power Pause website has lots of articles and advice for navigating career transitions and balancing family life.
Protect your energy. Boundaries aren’t just cute - they’re survival. Practice saying “not right now” to anything that drains you.
Final Word
Maternity leave isn’t a gap in your resume. It’s a turning point in your story. It’s a radical act of service, a portal into matrescence, and a sacred (if chaotic) power pause.
Honour it. Feel it. And when you're ready to re-enter the world - know you’re not going back. You’re moving forward. And you’re doing it with hard-won wisdom, fresh (-ish) eyes, and a whole new level of badass.
(And maybe a ton of dry shampoo).
